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Free Daily Horoscopes, July 31st



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Aries Horoscope

Keep out of the way of fast moving cars, elevator shafts and election campaigners today, as accidents could happen. Staying out of harm's way will keep you in one piece but you never know what's lurking right around the corner. It could be a boa constrictor or Fergie, and then you're screwed.


Taurus Horoscope

It may be hard to focus on the details as you near the end of a trying day. But don't punch out yet; there's still work to be done. Use the minutiae of the afternoon to hold your attention. Just a quick glimpse of the UPS guy in his tight brown uniform will be enough to perk you right up.


Gemini Horoscope

Let the busybodies gossip away today; to you it's just so much incomprehensible chatter. You'll be glad to know that they never include you in their chat fests. It's probably because they know that you have enough dirt on them to sully their reputations well into next year.


Cancer Horoscope

You will feel an intense connection with someone you meet today. You'll feel like you've known him for a long time, even though he's a stranger. You like this guy, and want to spend more time with him. Maybe you should look at yourself in the mirror a little more often.


Leo Horoscope

The mighty lion may find himself lying with the lambs today. A rare bout of introspection could have you on the down low contemplating some of life's bigger issues. But those lambs have nothing to worry about when you come around. They're not your type.


Virgo Horoscope

Things will suddenly make sense to you today. You won't be sure what kicked off this clarity of vision, but go with it while you've got it. Use this talent as you meet men tonight. You'll find that half of what most guys say makes no sense at all.


Libra Horoscope

A little voice in your head will urge you to take the day off. But a dedication to responsibility will keep you from doing that. In the long run you'll be happy with your decision, although it may take time to make amends with the little voice.


Scorpio Horoscope

Start making plans for the coming weekend, because you'll need extra time to call back phone numbers you've been collecting. Some of those guys won't even remember you, but you'll get enough connections to make the weekend look promising.


Sagittarius Horoscope

You may have a difficult time with authority figures today. So avoid guys wearing uniforms, gym whistles or chaps made of leather. Okay, you'll make a concession for that last one, because we all have our little weaknesses.


Capricorn Horoscope

You're like a surgeon as you cut precisely to the heart of problems. You may need these skills to dissect your own hemorrhaging relationship. An outside source will have to be enlisted, because you get queasy at the sight of your own blood.


Aquarius Horoscope

People will be running on different agendas than you, but that won't keep you from getting things done. It's possible to run parallel to them without actually having to meet them, and you'll prefer it that way. It's a win-win situation, especially for you.


Pisces Horoscope

Sometimes you don't need to know everything about a guy before getting serious with him. Think about new relationships like a book, and you're on chapter one. Watching personality traits unfold can be fun, or a harbinger of unpleasant things to come.




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